Well, when I posted that the PhD was likely going to involve a new way of thinking, I don't even think I realized to what extent that might be. Indeed, it is different. On one hand, it is very hard to go from being a very proficient clinician to... studying theory and philosophy.
Sadly, on the other hand, I don't even think that I can say it's hard. More or less, I feel intellectually bored. Sure, they give oodles to read, and now oodles of writing is coming down the pike, but I can't really say that I feel mentally stimulated.
Instead I find myself doing other things, like this. :) I even signed up for a 7- week course through the local community. I'm getting a chance to run more than I ever could while working as a Trauma NP. My other projects are getting valuable attention.
Yet my classmates, albeit there's only 4 of us total, say how overwhelmed they feel. I sort of feel like, "Am I missing something?" Okay granted, there's plenty to do, but it honestly feels more like busy-work than bearing true value to the real world. I'm looking for meat & potatoes. Substance. Not philosophy.
Now I don't want to be too much a downer, because that's not me, so I'm just going to hold my breath and hope for the best. Let me find a silver lining- perhaps learning how I can affect large-scale change will be next semester.
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I can only imagine how different it is, going from a clinic to a classroom again.
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